Brett Farrey

I’ve been working on computers in some capacity for years now. I first became a Dell fan when I was fresh out of college and working at the University of Wisconsin Athletic Department’s Help Desk. I had to fix many a Dell, but loved them due to their great support.

It’s been a few years since I’ve called Dell support, but I figured I’d do so for a friend of mine’s computer. The BIOS wasn’t recognizing it’s hard drive anymore, and it was making an awful clicking noise. It was clear the hard drive was fried. I called tech support, and I was actually surprised how quickly I got a human on the phone. Once I got someone on the phone, I notice he had a VERY, VERY thick Indian accent. He says, “Hi, my name is Sam, can I have your service tag number?” It was actually one of the few things I actually understood, but that’s because I already knew what he was going to say, aside from his phoney name. I could be wrong, but I’m guessing Sam isn’t a popular name in India.

I probably spent an hour on the phone with Sam. He had me doing all of these checks, which is the norm, except I had to wait a few minutes between each check. Eventually, I had to tell him that I wasn’t doing anymore checks on the system and he was going to send me a hard drive. I thought that did the trick, but he than started asking me questions about the system, and ultimately suckered me into trying a few more things. Finally, he asked me to take the battery out of the motherboard. I said, “what does that have to do with the hard drive clicking?” He said he needed to put me on hold for a few minutes. FINE!

The conversation with this guy was priceless….

Sam: Are there any lights on the front of the computer?

Me: Yes. There are three green lights labeled 1, 2, and 3.

Sam: So there are lights?

Me: Yes.

Sam: What do they say?

Me: 1, 2, and 3.

Sam: What color are they?

Me: Green.

Sam: Let’s try rebooting the computer and see if the lights change.

Me: (after reboot) They’re the same.

Sam: What color are they?

Me: I’m not repeating myself anymore!(blood pressure rising)

This guy knew less about computers than my 5 year old niece that just graduated kindergarten. I grew to love Dell because of their support, not necessarily because their hardware was better than any other company. I’ve dealt with companies like Quark who have awful support. In fact, Quark still has the worst phone support on the planet. Anyway, if Dell doesn’t do something quick, they’ll lose customers, and I mean A LOT of them….including myself.